Day 248 – A Picture A Day While My Soldier’s Away

It snowed all day today like this, it was depressing.  I’m tired of the snow, the cold, and the dreary skies.  I’m tired of layers of clothes and wet shoes.  We lost power for 3 hours and sat in the cold, dark house staring at each other.  I’m tired of typing the words “a picture a day while my soldier’s AWAY”.  I’m tired of counting the days that you’ve been gone – especially considering that I didn’t even start counting until almost 4 months into our deployment.  I’m tired of parenting an unruly 3 year old on my own.  I’m just tired.  I didn’t take this picture – I saw it on the clarksville now webpage and thought it symbolized the type of day it was.  The sign stands strong in the middle of the snow storm, but it’s fading and hard to see.  That’s how today felt for me.

Initially, the above paragraph was the full post that I wrote for the day.  I felt guilty for being so ungrateful, yet obligated to be honest as well.  The next morning I thought, surely I could find something to be happy about in all situations.  We can see the sky and we have clothes.  We have electricity {most of the time}.  We may have an unruly 3 year old, but she is healthy and growing up just fine.   As I was driving and thinking these thoughts of gratitude, I passed by the lines of trees and flags on post.  I stared out my window.  God spoke to me so clearly that it nearly took my breath away.  I pulled over, caught my breath, and took a picture.  Although I’ve been counting the days that you have been AWAY, I am so grateful that you are coming home safe, alive, in one piece, unharmed.  I get to wrap my arms around you and live with you next to me, unlike so many wives here that only have a folded up flag and a memory.  I thank God for keeping you safe, bringing you home to me soon, and reminding me to always find something to be grateful for.

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Day 248 – A Picture A Day While My Soldier’s Away

  1. Girl…you’ve got to stop taking MY breath away like that! This post is absolutely, positively amazing. I can’t tell you how many times I have looked at those trees on post with the intention of photographing them and yet I kept procrastinating (I’m sure you’re surprised that I procrastinate :).
    I’m so happy that your love is coming home soon, safe and sound. I can’t wait for when you can make posts about your soldier being HOME. I think about you (and all the other wives and children who have their soldier away) daily and I am so grateful to all the Army families for the sacrifices that not only your soldiers are making but that you are making as well. You’re an inspiration and I hope that you never, ever forget that.

  2. I know exactly how you feel. That was how I felt too…I was jolted back to reality by a story the FRG told me of her friend who was pregnant with their first child and her husband was en-route home, his plane crashed and he was killed. I started thinking after that. Yeah, he’s coming home whether or not its tomorrow, Friday or Monday he’s coming home. I had to find more and more reasons to be grateful for what I have in front of me rather then dwelling on whats missing. At this point of the deployment it’s not easy, by far. Seeing more and more wives celebrating their husbands return while I sit here wondering…”will he make this flight?”, “will he leave today?” It gets frustrating, stressful and makes me jealous and I hate being jealous. Its nice to know I’m not alone. There’s a chance that all of us would be in the same Hangar waiting for our men to walk through those doors.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s